An Amish boy and his father were visiting a large mall for the first time and were amazed with everything they had seen. What really amazed them was these 2 shiny metal bits of wall that could open and close.
The boy asked what it was.
The father, never having seen an elevator in his life, told the son he didn't know.
At that point, an obese old woman struggled to walk into the elevator and the doors closed. They watched the numbers on the top rise all the way to number 7, stop and then start coming down again. When the elevator reached the ground floor again, out stepped an absolutely stunning 24 year old blond lady.
The dad, not taking his eyes of the blond woman, says to his son "son, go fetch your mother".